First Hug February

I’ve never had a hug… never… this is so sad right? Well, yeah, I’m 17 so I should have had a hug by now. But no, that’s why next month I am going to try and get a hug, my first ever hug. But first…

“I pledge my commitment to the Blog for Mental Health 2015 Project. I will blog about mental health topics not only for myself, but for others. By displaying this badge, I show my pride, dedication, and acceptance for mental health. I use this to promote mental health education in the struggle to erase stigma.”


So I am joining the Blog For Mental Health Project, I saw the project last year when I started blogging but the year was almost over so I thought I would wait until the 2015 project started. And here it is! Everyone who reads my blog knows I struggle with my mental health everyday, but I also like to share my experiences and help others which is what I hope I can do through this project. So I am participating, and I hope you do too! Click here to read more about Blog For Mental Health 2015!

I Will Try To Get My First Hug
Next month will be called First Hug February. As you may remember from one of my previous posts, I have never had a hug. As a 17 year old guy (somebody thought I was a girl, why?) it seems strange to me that I’ve never had a hug. I know there is a stereotype that guys can’t show emotions but I really want to know what it feels like.

I spent an hour and a half crying yesterday because I was thinking about never being hugged. This was while I was alone at night, in my bed. After about 30 minutes I started to search on the internet what it feels like to be hugged, and it made me want a hug even more. I then went on Youtube and searched how to hug so I could prepare for the day it happens!

Honestly, I’m not exactly sure how you hug someone. Do you just put your arms around them? I’m worried that I might do it wrong, I don’t have the experience that everyone else has. I’m also worrying how long do I hug someone for? I want to hug someone for a couple hours so I can make up for the time I missed. I hugged my pillow last night for at least half an hour, but I don’t think I can do that to a person.

So... this is how you hug...

So… this is how you hug…

I’ve decided that I might hug my friend (the friend who knows about my depression) if I see them on Monday. They are a girl so I don’t want to make things awkward, but I can’t imagine hugging any guys that I know. I’m not sure whether to tell them before that I’ve never been hugged because I’ll probably start crying when I hug them which will make things even more awkward, I presume. As you can tell, I am worrying a lot about this. It never bothered me before my depression started, but now I really want a hug. My other option is to hug a random stranger… but they might get angry at me…

Anyway, as you can see I have thought about this for a long time. I want to have my first hug, I really do! What should I do? Readers, I need some hugging advice, help me hug! And yeah, I know I’m overthinking all of this but it means so much to me, you probably don’t understand. If you know someone with depression, give them a hug, I hope my friend reads this. When I get my hug I will tell you as it will be the happiest I have ever been…


21 thoughts on “First Hug February

    • I was thinking the same things. My little ones get so many hugs every single day that they couldn’t count that high. It makes me really sad for someone not to have had a hug! I’d hug you if I were around, if it wouldn’t creep you out being hugged by a 33 year old mommy. πŸ™‚ My suggestion with your friend is to just say “You know, I’ve never had a hug and I really need one. Can I have a hug, buddy?” or something like that. She’ll give you one so you won’t be the weirdo suddenly grabbing her and freaking her out. If she’s like most teenage girls, hugging is normal.

      Liked by 1 person

  1. electricbohemian says:

    Oh no.. Oh no.. That makes me wish I could hug you! Maybe You can be the radical one giving the hugs to everyone and you’ll probably find that when you do it your friends will automatically do it – it will become the norm and you’ll wonder why you ever worried. Good luck! Just cause your a man doesn’t mean you can’t show your emotions and when you enter into a romantic relationship you’ll find most women do like someone who can show kindness and give good hugs so you can start practicing now!


  2. electricbohemian says:

    oh and really you’ll find hugging quite natural don’t you tube it just do it! The only reason why it might be difficult is because we are not used to doing it therefore you have to keep doing it and soon it will become normal and you’ll enjoy life much more.. oorrrrr you could hug an animal first – is there a place in your area that you can walk dogs ..they are great cause they will always give you love and tenderness without judgement.. for humans that is hard to do.


      • electricbohemian says:

        Yes don’t overthink otherwise it will be a disappointment cause you’ll be too much like a robot. Maybe you could see if anyone wants some help walking their dog – or if you have animal shelter you can go there.. its very good for the mind animals – maybe a farm is near to you that could be worth a shot, maybe a horse but sheep don’t really like to be hugged.. unless you are feeding them.. I learnt allot of these things when I was little and would hug any animal! Animals are great πŸ™‚

        Liked by 1 person

      • electricbohemian says:

        now here youtube is handy you just need to approach them quietly and tentatively. Apparently horses are very picky about there friends and so I think with humans too.. you just have to be gentle.. Probably hugging a horse would not be the best step yet that would put you off hugging for life if it kicked you tee hee.. I would stick to smaller animals first! πŸ™‚

        Liked by 1 person

  3. NotAPunkRocker says:

    I realize every parenting style is different, but as a mom to an 18 year old boy, I can’t imagine this. At all. I am sorry you haven’t had this yet and hope you get one soon. Sending virtual ones in the meantime…

    Liked by 1 person

  4. My heart goes out to you. I’m sorry your parents have never hugged you and only told you they love you once. The little things we take for granted. Makes me wanna go hug my kids right now.


  5. Oh wow. I’m a super-hugger. I hug just about anyone for any reason…or at least I used to. My depression & anxiety have made me less of a “hug hello” person than I used to be, but boy if I could I’d give you a hug.
    Like Not a Punk Rocker I can’t imagine going 17 years without hugging my son. I rarely go a day without hugging him multiple times.
    I wish my husband hugged me more. He used to, but we haven’t had much of a physical relationship lately.
    Don’t be afraid to ask for a hug.
    When I ran my 5k last week, I would have killed to have a hug from Hubby after I crossed the finish line. But since he was at work, I just went up to one of my guy friends and just said “can I have a hug?” And he obliged.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. are your parents related to mine?? love meant not being yelled at for bringing home a c. i’m not sure i received a hug from someone outside my family until out of high school.

    two bits of advice:

    1. ask for hugs. you might even tell your girl and friend your story, then ask for one. If you want to get radical, there are people who roam the streets of seattle holding ‘free hugs’ signs. seattle is considered a pretty liberal city, though.
    2. don’t try to squeeze the puddin’ out of the receiver. many times a gentle hug can have just as much power as a puddin’ squeeze hug.

    Sending internet hug you way.


  7. AJ says:

    You need to loosen up! be yourself! Its awkward I know but they
    are humans and its nice when someone hugs you so they will not feel anything but nice and you would too☺
    Hope you made the effort as I believe my comment is a little delayed

    Liked by 1 person

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